Standing the Pain
by ravenbow
Summary: Lloyd is mourning over the second loss of his father and is feeling lonely. Kratos finds Lloyd by his mother's grave. Takes place after the game is beaten. *SPOILERS* Note: KratosxLloyd NOT YAOI! Strictly father/son love. R&R if you feel like it.


This story takes place after you've beaten the game, so there are SPOILERS. AS WARNED IN THE SUMMARY. PLEASE **do not** blame me if you feel like reading this then playing the game and I've spoiled it for you. You've been warned... TWICE.

Oh my god! I wanted to cry the whole time I was writing this. I got the urge to write this one shot today, and I was drawing it. But I thought it would be much better to write it out for everyone to read. It's KratosxLloyd, but there's no incest; it's father/son love. It's still really good, please read it! You don't have to review if you don't want to/can't. But I'd appreciate it a lot.

**By the way, if you have the soundtrack for Tales of Symphonia, listen to the song called "Standing the Pain" while reading this. It's the song I wrote this fanfic to.**

**In this fanfic: **

_Sentences that look like this_ : Are used for when people are thinking.

"Sentences that look like this" : Are used for verbal speaking.

_"Sentences that look like this!"_ Are used when someone is talking loudly. VERY... loudly.

* * *

Lloyd sat alone, looking up at the stars, as he so often did, on the bench in his father's yard. He wasn't really looking at the stars though. He knew, whether he'd admit it or not, was looking for the comet known as Derris Kharlan.

His father was currently on that damned comet, taking his only blood-related family away slowly; and he could do nothing about it. His heart ached as he replayed the event of his father, Kratos, leaving him; asking Lloyd to take him to Derris Kharlan using the Eternal Sword. Tears began to roll down his cheeks as the mental image danced behind shut eyes.

_Father… please… come back!!!_

His mind screamed the silent words to his father, hopelessly wishing his pleas would reach him, though they were most likely light years apart from each other.

Lloyd got up and dragged himself to his mother's grave at the back of Dirk's house. He collapsed to the ground sobbing quietly, looking up to the tall gravestone that shielded his mother's body. He clenched his fists against the stoned floor as he felt rain drops splash at his teary-eyed face.

He began to wail loudly, the mournful cries echoing through the forest and out to the world. He acknowledged that Dirk was home, but he didn't care. He did this more often than not, and his father was used to this by now. It had been going on for longer than months that Lloyd sat here and cried his heart out.

Dirk looked through the window of the main room and closed his eyes. He left the window and retreated elsewhere, so his boy could be alone. He knew Lloyd wouldn't want himself to see him crying.

Lloyd's wails of pain and torture continued and the rain began to plummet down growing louder and louder; though the sound of harsh rain couldn't even drown out Lloyd's voice. He screamed unto the heavens, to his father;

"_Why?! Why did you leave me!!_"

A question he asked himself far too much.

He clutched his red-gloved hand to his chest as it heaved, tears mixed with rain water streaming down his face.

"Mom!... Please…! Bring him back… bring him to me... to us!"

He pleaded as he looked up to his mother's grave stone, wishing more than ever that she was here with him. Then he wouldn't be so alone; so without answers. These feelings were ridiculously painful to bear; no one should have to suffer through the hell of losing both their parents like he did.

He forced his legs to lift his weight. He limped to and leaned against the tombstone, his forehead resting heavily on its cold surface. He reached his hand up and slid his fingers gently over the name that printed there.

" 'Anna'… mother…" he choked out in a raspy gasp.

A loud whine escaped his throat, and he slid down and back to his knees, collapsing completely; his elbows hitting the ground. More sobs were heard in his head. His throat went into another coughing fit and he grasped at his throat wishing Kratos was there. He screwed his eyes shut as more tears leaked out of their corners while resting his head on his knees. He wrapped his arms around his torso to try to hold himself together.

_This feeling… I'm shattering. This can't go on…I can't take much more…_

He thought in his head. The feeling of cool rain collided with his shirt. It was dark red now from the water and he was soaked to the bone. He didn't care though. This happening so much he actually brought up immunity to sickness. And even if he did get one, he'd do this regardless.

Suddenly, a soft, deep, and familiar voice that had stuck in his mind these past months ran through his ears. He raised his head a little, looking at the ground with lifeless eyes and his arms still holding his stomach as he fought the urge to vomit.

"Lloyd?…" The voice came out drenched with sympathy.

The boy raised his head more, for the voice sounded more distinct now. Yes, the voice was Kratos' voice, his father's voice. Using his hands for support, he turned his head to look over his shoulder. His reddened eyes were still streaming tears, but they were wide with hope.

Lloyd couldn't believe his eyes. Was the rain playing tricks on him? Yes, that must be it. But then… why was the illusion walking towards him?

"Lloyd…" the soothing voice called out to him again.

"Kra… Kratos?" Lloyd called out in a pitiful voice. He received a short chuckle in reply.

"I can't leave you alone at all, can I?" the soothing voice whispered sadly.

Light footsteps rang through Lloyd's ears. The figure stood right before him, towering over him.

Lloyd looked up to the figure like an abandoned puppy. His eyes were full of sorrow; his legs folded and out to the side, his arms holding together what the hole left that slowly eating away at him. He examined the figure as well as he could, trying to ignore the blurryness of the tears in his eyes.

Silken spiked auburn hair… sharp amber eyes that now showed remorse… tanned skin… toned muscles… brown belts… light blue and white cloth… These were the characteristics that painted into Lloyd's mind whenever he thought of Kratos. And now… they were painted right before him.

He whimpered out, "D-… dad?", sounding very much like a child who just woke from a nightmare.

"I'm here Lloyd…" The voice cooed comfortingly.

A gloved hand reached out to his face; Lloyd flinched slightly. But when he thought it was going to retreat, it merely hesitated for only a moment, like it was dealing with a wounded animal.

It found the curve of Lloyd's jaw line, and he leaned into it softly, his eyes half open as his eyes began to release more water. Lloyd reached his right hand to the other that was currently holding him. He choked out another sob, and he looked up as a man shielded him from the freezing rain. He knelt down to Lloyd and wrapped his arms around the younger boy's shoulders.

"Lloyd… it's okay. I'm here…Dad's here."

Lloyd was brought up against the warm body, his sobs muffled by the torso that now protected him. The familiar scent of Kratos, rushed through and overcame all of his senses.

His voice cracking to a higher sound than normal, Lloyd whimpered out,

"You're here… you're actually here? This isn't fake?"

Lloyd looked up at the man. Lloyd reached out to touch the man's face, feeling solid and real skin, real hair, emitting heat... This was no illusion. More tears began to show in Lloyd's red eyes.

"Yes son… I'm here…" At this, Lloyd forced the two to embrace tighter, throwing his arms around his father's neck, and he cried out,

"Kratos... Father… I… I can't believe--"

"Shh… it's okay. I _am_ here… I am..." Kratos held his son's hair away for a moment and kissed his son's temple and tightened his arms. He cradled Lloyd in his arms and held his body.

"Dad…" Lloyd croaked out weakly.

"Lloyd…"

"Please Dad… don't leave me," Lloyd said between crying and gasping for air.

"I don't wanna be alone anymore…" he continued, his voice trailing into more sobs.

Lloyd looked into his father's eyes. Kratos was crying too.

"Lloyd… I'm so sorry. Please forgive me…" Kratos kissed the boy's chocolate colored hair, crying with his son on the cool rocky ground as the rain continued on.

"I won't leave you."

* * *

Okay... so? Who's still reading?

How was it? I wanted to cry the whole time I was writing this. I loved writing this story the most. Please review, if you feel up to it!


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